Pitch a fit, get on FOX, ATX!

If you ever dreamed of staring at Gordon Ramsay's craggy face close-up, or had his shriek pierce your ears in person, you donkey, now's your chance.

Kitchen Nightmares is coming to Austin, most specifically to El Greco, which calls itself a Greek "Taverna."

Austinites are most likely too polite and worn out from the brutal drought of summer 2k11 to be the ideal test-run audience for FOX's Kitchen Nightmares (aka, be scene-making fussy brats), so please encourage the unkind, fame-whorish, sharply critical types in your life to apply.

According to the Statesman, all one has to do is email, request a reservation, then fill out a survey. Here's what they said:

• After putting out a call last year looking for restaurants in need of an overhaul, the "Kitchen Nightmares" production team, including fiery host Gordon Ramsay, will be in Austin at the end of the month to help turn around El Greco, the Greek restaurant at 3016 Guadalupe St. If you're interested in snagging a seat during production, send an email to austindining AT gmail.com.

I have already applied, and while I would never cause a scene just to get on camera, I love Greek food and would be happy to get a reservation, even in the "before" phase of the rehab and I end up nibbling tainted chicken.

The survey is super basic and not at all challenging. I won't post my answers here, but this is the survey I got from the gmail account listed above.

Thank you for your interest in dining at El Greco while we film
Kitchen Nightmares.

Please help us learn a little bit about your community by filling out
the quick survey below. We would be grateful for your participation
which helps Chef Ramsay get a local understanding of what the
community really needs or wants.

We will be in touch in the order we have received your request to
confirm your reservation.

Thank you.

Austin Restaurant Survey

1. How old are you? (please circle one)

18-25 25-40 40-60 65-100

2. What do you currently do? (please circle one)

Student Work Unemployed Retired

3. Do you ever go out to eat in the campus area? If so, where?
(please in the order you most frequent)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

4. When choosing a restaurant, which one of the following would most
influence your decision? (Rank from 1 to 5)
___Price
___Menu
___Recommendation
___Atmosphere/Scene
___Review

5. Have you ever heard of a restaurant named El Greco in the Campus
area? (YES/NO)

6. If so, what have you heard about it?

7. Have you ever eaten at El Greco? (Yes/No)

8. If yes, what did you think of the following?

Food: ___________________________________________________________________________

Service: _________________________________________________________________________

Décor: __________________________________________________________________________

9. Would you return to El Greco? (Why or Why not)

10. If you have not been to El Greco, why not?

11. What other Greek restaurants do you eat at in Austin?